Shadows and Leadership

November 4th is coming. Leaders will be elected and re-elected.

I find myself in awe of this human process that we’ve created. For many months now there has been the onslaught of speeches, debates, campaign ads, analysis of the candidates from news agencies, issues being discussed among the population, arguments rising, emotional buttons pushed, cheap shots taken, conspiracy theories passed around, and yes… let’s not forget the silence.

I am fascinated by this whole process of selecting our next leaders of this country, state, county, etc. I believe it to be fertile soil for inquiry within. An opportunity to look at what lays underneath all the emotion and observation. The hidden truth – the shadows prevalent around leadership. What we hide, repress and deny with regard to leadership, authority, governance, etc.

This isn’t to say choices won’t be made in the voting booth that come from a place of consciousness, an awareness of what is important to us and why. Yet, what about those subtle nudges, the knee jerk reactions, the shot of adrenaline, or fear, or anger, or the numbing dullness? What do you feel right now?

What do you see?

When I watch the two “mainstream” candidates speak, I see children in men’s bodies attacking each other and defending themselves. I see them get asked questions in the public that they skirt and then immediately get up on their stump and deliver some practiced flow of words. I see them throwing numbers around that are not factual. And I see them use key phrases that strike viewer emotional chords, like “lower taxes”, “create more jobs”, “war on terror” (they even accent these phrases with their voice when they say them).

I feel fear that this is the accepted norm.

I see printed words of theirs that say they are about change, yet read their history only to find they are not the “mavericks” they claim to be. I see this charismatic character on the screen speaking inspiring words and yet their past reveals this only to be a facade of the time.

I feel anger that I’m not seeing the “real” man.

I see men who are not who they claim to be. Dishonest men. I see men who are so deeply entrenched in the system as it is. I see men who are without a sense of their own integrity and who are not willing to be accountable for their actions. And I see men who have not stepped out of the box and championed real change, without regard to their popularity.

I see men who are not the leaders I want to lead me.
I see men who are not the leader I want to be.
I see men who are not who I want to be.

All of this is fodder for exploration if I choose it. It lights the way to what I believe to be true about leadership. Who do I want to lead this nation? What qualities should they posses? What character should they have? Should their basic principles of their past and present be congruent? Should their words and actions be congruent? Should they be willing to risk their political future to stand for what really is in their heart and soul?

Do I seek protection from my fear through them? Do they need to be a warrior knight who rides in on his white horse to my rescue? Am I looking to be safe or saved? Am I looking for a King? Am I looking for perfection? Am I looking for God?

Perhaps. I understand how shadow works in my life and when it comes to an issue like leadership, I feel a deep stirring inside. I am aware that much of what I see and feel right now is about the leader that I want to be in my life. About how I show up everyday in my life. It’s an opportunity to investigate my own apathy, my own apprehension to take the reins of my life and steer the course that serves me, my family, my community, and my world.

May clarity be my guide as I exercise my right to vote this week.

However it turns out, one thing is for sure – we all will have more opportunity to look into the mirror and see how we are showing up in our own lives. And that’s a beautiful gift.